How to Date when You Are Overweight


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Feeling Confident on Dates

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    Dress well and look your best. You should always put your best foot forward whether you are asking someone out or going on a first date. Wear clean, well-fitting clothes and make sure you are well-groomed before meeting up with a potential partner.[1]

    • A statement necklace, flashy eye makeup, or a perfectly groomed beard will show your date that you are confident in your style.

    Tip: Take a shower, brush your teeth, and put on deodorant before your date to make sure you smell good, too!

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    Let your personality shine. If your date has agreed to go out with you, they already like who you are. Solidify their opinion by using humor, talking about your interests, and asking them questions about their life and hobbies.[2]

    • First dates are all about getting to know the other person. Don’t take your date too seriously, and try to have fun!
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    Avoid talking negatively about yourself to your date. It can be tempting to put yourself down or belittle yourself to your date. However, making negative comments about your weight or appearance can make your date feel uncomfortable, or make it seem like you are searching for compliments. Keep your conversation upbeat, and avoid topics that make you feel down.[3]

    • Putting yourself down before someone else can is a common defense mechanism to protect against feeling insulted. Try to trust that your date won’t want to make you feel bad.
    • For example, try saying, “I’m not super happy with the way I look right now, but I’ve been running in the park recently for exercise and I’m really enjoying getting out in nature.”
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    Use positive, confident language about your body. The phrase “fake it until you make it” really applies here. Even if you don’t love the way that you look right now, try to keep your thoughts and words positive so that you feel confident in yourself.[4]

    • Confidence is attractive. If you like who you are, your date is more likely to like you, too.
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    Be open and inviting with your body language. If you feel like you want to close yourself off, your body language may express that you aren’t interested in your date, even if you are. Keep your head held high and your shoulders back when you are sitting or standing. Try not to hunch over or cross your legs away from your date.[5]

    • Try to keep eye contact with your date as they talk, and never cross your arms. If you look away as your date speaks or cross your arms at them, they might think you don’t like them.
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    Talk about things besides your weight or your diet. Although your weight and what you may be doing to work on it can seem like the most important thing to you, your date might not be interested in the specifics of your diet or workout regimen. Use a date as an opportunity to get to know another person and see if your personalities click. You can mention your weight or your diet a few times, but try not to let it take over the whole conversation.[6]

    • Try asking your date about their hobbies and interests to see if you have anything in common.
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    Take rejection as a learning experience. Not everyone will want to go on a date with you when you ask, and that’s okay. Maybe they aren’t ready for a relationship, or maybe you didn’t get to know them first before you asked them out. Try to take rejection as a chance to learn and improve for next time instead of a huge set-back.[7]

    • People who reject you solely because of your weight are not good people, and you probably don’t want to date them anyway.

 

Source: wikihow. com


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